A Series of Self-Posed Questions and Answers Regarding Twilight

Twilight Eclipse is set to hit the big screen in a couple of weeks, which has created quite a buzz amongst tweens, teens, and adults who don’t wash.  I’m often asked my opinion on the Twilight Saga.  Here are some of my thoughts.

Did I read the Twilight books?  No I didn’t.  I don’t do fiction.

Did I like the previous movies?  I can’t really comment on that because I’m not a fifteen year old girl that finds Robert Pattinson’s “Robert Smith” hair style sexy.

Am I excited for the new chapter in the Twilight saga?  No, I’m not. I’m an adult who washes on a daily basis.

Was I excited when the LC told me she saw Robert Pattinson at the Starbucks in our apartment building last year?  No I wasn’t, I didn’t know who Robert Pattinson was.

Was I slightly more excited when the LC told me he was the star of the Twilight movies? No I wasn’t, I had never heard of the Twilight movies.

Do I find Kristen Stewart attractive? Slightly.

Does she look like she has a strange smell about her?  Yeah, she does. She looks like she smells like feet.

Do I even know what Twilight Eclipse is about?  No I don’t because as I previously mentioned I’m an adult and I wash myself on a daily basis.

Will Twilight Eclipse be a big winner on opening day?  No, but by no means will it be the biggest loser at the theater on opening day.

That’s it… that’s all I know about Twilight.