Archive for Vancouver

UBC LipDub… Not How I Remember UBC!

Posted in Education with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 17, 2011 by Jordan

A couple of days ago I received an email with a link attached to it with a caption reading, “Not quite how you remembered it, eh?”  Intrigued by the caption, I clicked the link and watched the corresponding video which was a video created to help University of British Columbia (UBC) students feel a stronger connection to their largely commuter based school.  As a graduate of UBC, I must say I thought the video was pretty well done; however, what I saw in this video is in no way shape or form a reflexion of what I experienced at UBC while obtaining either or my degrees.

It’s very possible that the culture of the Point Grey campus has changed since I graduate in 2009 (I hardly doubt it but I am willing to concede that it is possible). I have a lot of memories of my time at UBC but none of them include anything portrayed in this video.

It’s not raining once in this video, which is about as likely at UBC as Kirstie Alley not weighing over 250 lbs.  Furthermore, the people in the video are completely out off character and misrepresented.  There aren’t more than seven white people that actually attend UBC so I’m not sure where all the white people in the video came from, Asian people don’t stand in libraries, they sleep on their calculus textbooks, and the engineers wouldn’t be caught dead near an Arts building due to various pretensions.  To top it all off, students at UBC don’t make eye contact with each other.  They burry their heads, walk into each other, and continue on with their days without saying a word to one other.  I also didn’t see one frat guy aggressively soliciting a student to join their frat, which is odd because I think frats are obsessed with doing that.

Despite all these oversights, the two most obvious aspects missing from this video are that there isn’t one heroin addict mumbling to themselves on the bus and there isn’t one homeless person armpit deep in a garbage can looking for discarded treasures.  How these two aspects were overlooked when making this video about UBC are beyond me.  Interacting with drug addicts and homelessness on a daily basis is an entrenched aspect of life as a UBC student.  I think it would have been pretty cool to see a disheveled mess mumbling to themselves during the scene on the bus or to see a homeless guy with his entire torso in the garbage can outside the Aquatic Center.

Alas, you can’t always get what you want and I’m sure it is very difficult to get drug addicts and homeless people to cooperate with an artistic vision.

City and Colour can Suck it and Keep on Suckin’ it!

Posted in Music with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 27, 2011 by Jordan

The 2011 Canada Games concluded in Halifax yesterday after two weeks of competition.  I took in a couple of hockey games and watched some long track speed skating at the outdoor oval one afternoon. The actual sports of the Canada Games did little for me (the athletes were young teenagers and the elite level of competition just wasn’t there for the most part) but I was a fan of the nightly free concerts put on by the games. Throughout the two weeks I took in four of the free shows, including; Joel Plaskett, Sloan, Hey Rosetta and City and Colour.  The concerts were all outside and other than Joel Plaskett’s show on Valentines Day the temperature was pretty cold for every concert.  However, it wasn’t until City and Colour took the stage last night that I heard a single band complain about the cold temperatures and essential let it ruin their show.

Going into last night, I had seen City and Colour play once before.  It was on other a brisk September evening a couple of years ago in Vancouver’s Stanley Park.  At this concert, Dallas Green commented after every song about the cold and how it kept affecting the tune of his guitar.  As their first song came to a close last night, I turned to my brother and said, “I guarantee you this band complains about the temperature and says that it keeps putting their guitars out of tune.”  Within five seconds of me saying that Dallas Green says, “We’re going to be taking a little more time than usual between songs because the temperature keeps putting our guitars out of tune.”  It was nice that Dallas didn’t make a liar out of me but he and his band followed that comment up with countless others like it throughout the night in addition to long delays between songs, stopping a song halfway through it because Dallas’s guitar went out of tune and taking a five minute break to warm up after playing just four songs.

I get that playing in -10˚ C temperatures is not ideal and that playing the guitar is tough when your hands are cold.  However, City and Colour did themselves no favors last night.  They failed to put their hipster image aside for one night and dress appropriately for the frigid temperatures.  Dallas was wearing a denim jacket with a scarf while the other guitar player wore a three-piece suit and a top hat.  To me, the incessant complaining fell on deaf ears for a host of reasons.  One, the girl that opened up for City and Colour in the exact same temperatures didn’t say a word about how cold she was, probably due to the fact that she wore a winter jacket and a toque.  Two, Sloan played in temperatures close to -30˚ C the week before and absolutely killed their set without muttering a word about how cold they were.  Again, these guys dressed appropriately by wearing parkas, toques and gloves with the fingertips cut out.  Last, City and Colour had several fans blowing hot air on them throughout the entire show.  From what I could tell, Sloan had just one bush league heater on the stage that the one guitar player occasionally heated his hands up with in-between songs.

I’m not saying that City and Colour is a bad band because they’re not…. they write some of the best “sui watch” songs in the business.  What I am saying is that they are a bunch of pussies and complainers that can’t handle less than ideal playing conditions. I have now seen City and Colour play two outdoor shows, neither of which was without complaints about the temperature.  Consequently, if you plan on watching an outdoor City and Colour show you best not waste your time unless the outside air temperature equals room temperature (roughly 20-21˚ C).  Because of this, City and Colour can suck it and Leah Miller can keep on suckin’ it!

The Man, The Myth, The Gemini Award Winner

Posted in Television with tags , , , , , , , , , , on November 14, 2010 by Jordan

It’s rare that you can drink alone and not feel like an alcoholic but as of right now I am experiencing one of those rare moments.  Less then an hour ago faithful Whole Ball of Wax reader and all round great guy Jared Keeso won the Gemini Award for his outstanding performance as Don Cherry in Keep Your Head Up Kids: The Don Cherry Story.  In addition, Benjamin Arthur (who is also an all round great guy) won the Gemini for his role in the T.V. show Less Than Kind.  Due to this great news, I am going to proceed to drink until I fall asleep on the couch and spill my beer on my crotch.

By no means do I have an acute knowledge of the Canadian film industry, but I have spent enough time with these two individuals to recognize and appreciate the amount of effort and commitment that goes into being an actor in Canada.  Not always the most glamorous of lifestyles, both Jared and Ben have made substantial sacrifices as they continuously strive to perfect their art.  The nature of the Canadian film industry probably means that the last minute notice for auditions won’t stop for either of these guys but tonight they can take solace in the fact that they are among the best at what they do in the entire country.  There are very few Canadians that can say they are the best in Canada at what they do and because of this rarity The Whole Ball of Wax wishes to congratulate both Jared and Ben for their truly outstanding accomplishments tonight.

Gary Bettman VS. Pee Wee Herman in an ALL OUT DEATH MATCH!

Posted in Sports, Television with tags , , , , , , , , , on June 11, 2010 by Jordan

Without question the fight of the century is taking place tomorrow night at UFC 115 in Vancouver, BC.  The highly anticipated match will see the Commissioner of the NHL, Gary Bettman take on the star of Pee Wee’s Playhouse, Pee Wee Herman in an all out death match.  The unadvertised and highly controversial match will commence at 8 pm (PT) in the concourse of GM Place and is expected to draw fans from all over the world.

The match is expected to be highly contested with an end result easily going either way.  Both combatants have exactly the same specs, fighting style and haircut.  The only factors that could reduce the overall quality of this fight are Bettman’s strong desire to move the fight to Glendale, Arizona and the fact that Gary Bettman and Pee Wee Herman are the EXACT SAME PERSON!  Consequently, spectators will have a real life Fight Club on their hands.

Pee Wee Herman will take the match of the century compliments of a challenge to Bettman to not shake his head while he speaks.  Bettman will become so frustrated by his inability to perform such a simple task that he will kill himself by overdosing on overpriced cotton candy and bottled water.

A death match for the ages!

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